"Strikeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.....I mean gutter ball!" I playfully yelled out loud to Q as he attempted to out do my score during our fourth straight game of bowling against each other. He looked back at me, gave me a smirk, and still managed to knock down 7 pins even with my interruption.
"Ha, beat that" he said.
We were having one of those great dates, you know the kind where everything he says is funny, when you can't stop smiling, and where living in the moment really is all that matters. I sashayed [purposefully] to pick up my ball. I had on my favorite jeans, the ones that are just the perfect fit, I knew he was watching me walk, I wanted him to.
I focused my eyes on the pins like I was gunning for a gold medal. Q laughed hard in the background and started shouting all types of things to distract me. I paid him no mind and hit my third strike of the night. I thru my hands up Michael Phelps style and did my winning dance, "I won, I won." Q scooped me up, threw me over his shoulders, and we exited the bowling alley [don't worry we returned the awful rented shoes].
"Where are we going next?" I asked.
"Back to your place." He said smiling.
My heart skipped a beat. Although he had been to my place to drop me off or stop in briefly we had never really chilled there. We always went to his house and I was more comfortable with that. In many ways I'm a private person, I don't like letting people into my personal space. However, I said nothing because it had been 3 months, and he always opened his home to me so why couldn't I open mine to him.
Just as I was becoming okay with the idea, another thought hit me. It had beeeeen 3 months...3 months....did he think...yes he def thinks it's time we stop playing and have sex. Sure we had our moments, but we had never gone all the way [yes I know that sounds old fashion]. I loved him for that, for being patient, a gentlemen, and not rushing me. He really didn't bring it up, (not that he didn't/doesn't) try. I've always been the kind of girl who believes in only sleeping with someone when you're in a committed relationship. Sex complicates things...it can hurt people...it can make you feel used..and ruin a great thing. I didn't want that to happen to us, I wanted us to take our time.
Every bad thought was running thru my mind. What if I sleep with him and then that's it? What if he's not as consistent as he has been? What if he ditches me the next week? It's not that I didn't want to, I just became...scared...of what would happen afterwards. This is after all an older man. Are the rules different when it comes to sex? 20 something males are so predictable because for the most part they're only after one thing. However, with Q it was hard to tell, he's so mature, there are no games, there's just clarity.
Before I knew it we were at my place, making out on my couch, and I felt him reaching into his pocket...."wait" I said.
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7 comments:
Girl, you're def gonna lose him if you don't give in soon. He seems like a great guy..so why wait??
LOL. I don't think she has to "give in" but I will say that.... hesbeensexingsomeoneelsethisentiretime ... whew just had to let that out.
Just kidding. I say talk to him. If he says we're just kicking it in that "Love Jones" kinda way then maybe he will bail after the sex... But I don't think he will.
you're a slor.
that's all! :)
p.s. joy's right...if u aint giving it up he getting it from somewhere...now they're exceptions to this of course...he can be in between butt but men have cycles and if u wait too long he'll call one of his old jawns...
it's just nature. nothing personal.
slor!
haha M.I.A.
first of all...joy is completely, utterly, and exactly right. he is smashing another chick, or multiple others. This is really the essence of his patience and composure. Cuz ain't nobody really that patience sis...
but i don't think thats a knock against him cuz he trying to build with you and just maintain physical sanity with the side joints. i mean, you datin other people, so that's also his right. however, statistics, history, and JP Kernisan say that while you might not be smashin' the dudes you casually date, chances are he is doing so with his chicks. after yall smidd-ash you will be able to read his behavior, and act accordingly.
but damn, at least let the nigga rock the boat! you know i feel strongly about this issue. he has done everything he was supposed to. reward him. reward yourself.
chuuuuuch
- JP
J.P.
I hate/like/love you!
..so well written.
i have so much more to say...but i shall wait.
patiently.
(no pun intended)
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